The kids go to their dad’s for a week, and then they’re here for a week.
Whether they’re coming or going, the transition is hard. Tears when they leave, and tears when they return. I don’t know what they’re like when I drop them off over there, but when they get dropped off here, it’s a busy couple of hours.
They arrive at the door with their bags and piles of clothes and books and slips of paper and special toys and news!news!news! One of them is invariably in tears within a half an hour, several of them squabbling, emotional meltdowns on every front.
There’s only one of me and three out of the four need my immediate attention the moment they walk in. They have long stories to tell, they have things they want to show me, secrets for my ears only. They’re tired, they’re wound up, they have to let off steam, and they need my help. After nearly five years of this, sometimes it seems like it’s getting harder for them, instead of it just being part of their routine. I think it has to do with emotional attachment, and the challenge of having to tear away, cope, and then re-bond.
It’s crappy to see them go through this over and over and over again.
tough one this. i used to loathe coming home time and be wanting it so much at the same time. The meltdowns were very disturbing to me. It also served to foster my anger for quite a few years. it sure is crappy.
Wow, a weekly rotation? I think that would be rough. I had once a month visitations with my dad, and 2 weeks out of every summer. They stopped when I was 11 though, and my mom moved 6 states away. I haven’t seen him in 28 years, though we’ve been in phone contact since 2000. Divorce sucks.
I’m sorry that you have to go through that every week. I’m sure that hurts your heart to see and it must drain you to have to deal with the emotional fallout.
When my middle daughter comes back from just two days of going to grandma’s, there’s always a big meltdown. It’s gotten to be that I hate the sleepovers, even though it means I get a break from the kids. It’s almost not worth it.
Big hugs, mama.